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the hardest thing is not talking to someone you used to talk to everyday
(via youmakemesmiilee)
И. (via perruh)

(Source: ppperfectionnn)

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greetings:

when u tell a joke and no one else laughs but u

image


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ilikepuzzles-kinda:

I honestly laughed really hard at this
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getyourassbeat:

opens window curtains, takes 50 selfies in natural light, closes window curtains


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aspirantly:

when someone screenshots your ugly snapchat

image


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majiinboo:

blackdenimjeans:

myfirstpubichair:

pyro83:

Why is it when I see a white girl with a tattoo on her thigh i think sexy? But a Latina I think ghettos as fuck?

because youre racist

Screaming

you really need to save things like this in your drafts and read them out loud a couple of times before you decide to hit publish now.


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vanillish:

*uses empty cheeto’s bag as my purse*


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professorfangirl:

prokopetz:

This is the one time of year that I love wasps.
Not because the wasps themselves get any nicer. They’re horrid little creatures year round. No, it’s because I have a couple of big apple trees out back, and late August, early September is when the apples start ripening.
Now, if you don’t harvest your own fruit, there are two things you need to know about apples.
The first thing you need to know about apples is that, when apples get ripe, they tend to fall from the tree at the slightest breeze.
I often work late at the office; by the time I get home, there are piles of apples scattered everywhere - and sure enough, the wasps are out in force, gorging themselves on the fruit. When I go to clean up the windfallen apples, the wasps naturally do the “rawr, I’ma fuck you up!” routine for which wasps are known.
The second thing you need to know about apples is that they ferment very rapidly in the late August heat.
So: the wasps try to come at me, but they’re too drunk to fly. They get about an inch off the ground, then faceplant directly into the turf, flip over onto their backs, and lay there, legs twitching in the air as they try in vain to find something to sting.
Perhaps I’m a man of simple pleasures, but I bust up laughing every. single. time.
Fucking wasps.

I tried to reblog this with a witty tag, but Tumblr took it as serious advice:
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